November 10, 2009 by cupofjane
Breaking the Silence
By: Kimberly Gomes
Sweat drips down my face, my body and blends with the tears of rage
streaming down my cheeks beneath my shirt and over my chest. I do not
care to wipe the remnants of the river because there is far too much to
worry about than that right now. Throughout my college experience I
have sporadically read snippets of horror stories, discussing the past
decade of warfare and mass rape in Africa’s Democratic Republic of
Congo, but nothing compares to what I saw tonight. The Greatest
Silence: Raping of Congo was far more than a cry of sympathy or
predictable stories some brush off as repetitious; it was raw reality.
As I watched the emptiness in the hundreds of faces that stared into
the camera, ranging from girls as young as 11 and women up to their
80’s, I had no words to follow the emotions I felt. To see the hundreds
of children born as a result of rape, instantly stigmatized by society
as a product of Congo’s ultimate taboo is far beyond something I can
rationalize. To hear the stories of women with chronically mutilated
vaginas, nonexistent walls between their bladders and rectum because
rebel militias, Rwandan soldiers and even there own Congolese soldiers
brutally raped them. Methods of penetration ranged between one to 20
different penises, sticks of wood, even guns and I hope to god it
doesn’t get worse than that. (Sadly I feel that hope is wrong) These
rapings most commonly occurred after militias looted their homes,
killed their husbands and sometimes even raping or murdering their
children if the returned compensation wasn’t enough.
Hearing the first hand stories of the rapist made this movie stand out
from the rest I’ve seen. It humanized the rapists, giving them a chance
to explain why the feel its justifiable to rape during war. I could see
it through their casual demeanor towards the camera and the subtle grin
that emerged when revealing their feelings about their actions that
rape has been a phenomena naturalized and expected in times of war. To
see the unremorseful grins of Mai Mai soldiers who claim to rape as a
patriotic and superstitious duty in order to assist luck in winning the
war against foreign invaders of Congo, to try to understand the logic
when a solider who’s raped approximately 25 women in his war travels
states that if he saw his wife or sister being raped and knew it was
for the sake of Congo he wouldn’t stop it- it evokes a clench in my
stomach and a fury in my eyes that is beyond words.
I am writing this not to demonize nor generalize the men of Congo or
the rebel militias who have done these crimes. I’m not writing this to
make these undoubtedly strong women appear as helpless victims or to
call necessary pity to the wives and children who have lost their place
in society due to this particular product of war. I am writing this to
relay a glimpse of what happens to women when placed amidst warfare-
the body becomes a tool of conquest, a means to attain power, “to feel
like a man” as one soldier put it. I am writing this to call attention
to a predominantly silenced subject that has violently thrived for over
10 years and the only immediate task to do for a young student like
myself is to relay the pain these women felt to those in the United
States that sit in our living rooms, scrolling Facebook trying to
conceptualize how this could even occur in such mass numbers.
Continue the spread of awareness, please take 76 minutes out of your
daily life and watch The Greatest Silence: Rape in the Congo. If you
got this far, I genuinely thank you for reading this and becoming more
away of what’s going on in the world around you.
November 10, 2009 by cupofjane
Hello to all the Cup of Jane contributors,
Sorry the site has been a big dormant lately, but it's time to get some brains shifting and conversations flowing! Some new categories, topics and such have been added in hopes to better represent a variety of discussion. Don't be shy, nows the time to speak up and let your opinions and questions be heard!
November 10, 2009 by cupofjane
A common thought that comes into my head after I hear traditionally conservative men or women speak about 'a woman's place' in the home and the natural obligations that cannot be defied with that or the 'man's duty to provide and hold dominance within the domestic sphere' - I wonder Can these people, who are rightfully entitled to their opinions, ever be awakened to social and gender equality? Will logical rationalization and intelligent analysis be sufficient or is it left the will of what is deemed natural? And if so outside the university setting how can we break down these walls that perpetuate social inequality and moreover limit both men and women from the maximum potential in whatever realm of life the choose to explore?
Speak on my friends. Let's hear what you think...
November 10, 2009 by cupofjane
I've had this discussion with Professor Ketchum, as well as many other classmates and would love to ignite a discussion through it. Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror and really felt something detached from the physical image of your body? If you have you understand the complex feeling that pervades the mind throughout this experience. Moments like these link to greater issues of the body and gender. Do you think your gender and the representation that comes with the FEMALE or MALE body limits you as an individual? Do you feel your soul is properly represented through your image of your body? Recognizing how the implications of placing such definitive importance on the body is critical to analyze in order to fully understand our place and potential as an individual in this world....send some comments back, I'm all ears!
November 10, 2009 by cupofjane
Lets gets some topics flowing folks! Feel free to give commentary on what you'd like to see added to the Cup of Jane site =)
March 26, 2009 by cupofjane
It’s a Friday afternoon and a dozen of fresh bagels enter the office break room. A silent excitement stirs as the writers crowd around the table, making their selections and pasting on the cream cheese of choice. However, soon enough the subtle calorie comments filter throughout the room. The copywriter reveals the amount of fat each slice while another man mentions his envy to the slender intern who can burn that bagel off with ease. As I savor my carb- happy treat I wonder: Where does this constant and mostly unnoticed weight concern derive from?
For goodness sake- it’s Friday, times are tough, why not rejoice for that amazing free bagel? But no, even through the subtlest situations like these one can notice diets have surpassed the level of ‘fad’ and turned into a lifestyle epidemic.
Do not mistake my tone; I am not criticizing those who eat healthy in efforts to maintain weight, because as a young college woman I am definitely one of them. However, I call to question how these uncomfortable calorie comments have become a natural part of dinner conversation. Of course veering away from a daily chili cheeseburger is a good call for obvious health reasons; but from this notion of avoiding ‘bad foods’ has come a judgmental trend of food and weight.
If the young woman next to the desk beside you grabs a whole bagel the woman next to you thinks “what a lucky bitch…she can just eat 3 of those things and not gain an ounce.” While the one grabbing it is wondering how many minutes it adds to her cardio session. Of course this isn’t applicable to all, but for the common majority of Orange County (and yes this claim derives from the stereotypical fit, healthy OC resident we all see on TV) there appears to be an obsession with staying trim.
The consequences? Our media- influenced culture naturalizes a slender and muscular body as the standard- the healthy expectation for the common majority. From this mentality stems a decline in self-esteem, constant need to “work it off” and a rise in crash diets and eating disorders. Although there is little we can do little about the amount of breast augmentation and plastic surgery commercials that sound off in our cars and televisions, we can easily become aware. By recognizing that this is not a part of natural life, but rather cultural socialization we can love our bodies and enjoy that bagel without the side comment of how many calories you just blew. For some this may seem impossible, while for others it's a piece of cake. But, most importantly, life's short! Loving the skin you’re in is the first step to be able to enjoy your food, your life and your body despite what the latest “Lose 20 pounds in 20 days” article tells you.
And that’s my view on the Friday bagel bonanza. Have a wonderful day.
March 19, 2009 by cupofjane
Glad to see Cup of Jane has traveled across the country! Keep those posts coming CarolineCatFood. Feel free to post your own questions and pass this site onto your friends. If Baltimore is lacking feminist outlets we are here to fix that =)
